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Musings of a frustrated phreak
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Catfish the catfisher
Posted:Jul 4, 2018 8:51 am
Last Updated:Jul 4, 2018 1:03 pm
157 Views

I was recently sent a friend request on Facebook from a person I didn't know. I checked his profile out and could tell it was Catfisher..... I love these guys!
I accepted and began my fishing expedition. As someone who has used multiple dating sites and apps ranging from E Harmony to Fet life I love it when someone tries to catfish me. I take on a different personality and really get into it!
I usually play along until I can see how they are going to get to the “endgame “ or the money pitch but this guy was just so bad that I think I might have had a beginner. At around 10 days in he made his biggest mistake, a group text to all 4 of his marks!! I remember I actually squealed in delight when it popped up .😁
I made sure to let the other women know what was happening. I texted and then called each one to explain that they were being scammed. I felt bad for them because they all were older, lonely women who really believed that a charming attractive man... a Dr no less, was sent by God to answer their prayers.
It pissed me off!
So operation “Catfish the Catfisher “ was enacted 😎
I first had all the women block him.... every one except me.
I then turned up the heat. Texting every 15 minutes (I used a timer) with a detail I had collected from each woman, alternating angry hurt heartbroken texts with undying protestations of my true undying love...
I was finally blocked and unblocked 5 times by my catfisher 😂 😆 😝
But I’m not done yet 😁
My next phase was the “I’m such a super phreak you might not be able to handle me” part. I began by sending X rated film clips of what I liked done... I mean the stuff that makes you feel dirty just watching it let alone even consider doing it... Animal porn, cuckhold bi- porn, hard core B&D... you name it, I sent it!
This started my” Send me a cock shot” portion of the fishing expeditions. I never got one!?!😐
My catfisher ...Dr Dave... finally moved to money phase of his scam when I told him I couldn’t continue to talk to him because my family was mad I had “fallen “ for a stranger. He finally blocked me for good when I told him I would send him money but only if he would Skype me so we could mutually masterbate vis video. 😎
Now I have been entertaining myself with this for a few weeks now but what Dr Dave doesn’t know is that one of his marks, a woman who lives nearby, has asked me to dinner. Come to find out, she is a bit “curious “ about my bisexuality.
Who Knew!?! 😁
6 Comments
Buzz Buzz in my brain
Posted:May 27, 2018 1:31 am
Last Updated:Jun 6, 2018 8:55 pm
149 Views

I am not the type to date multiple people at the same time. I might talk to multiple people at the same time but once I begin being intimate with someone, I stop talking to the others. The only real exception is when dating a man who understands my bisexuality and welcomes my desires for the other sex. I've never experienced a partner like that.
I also do not miss men when dating a woman.
I am confused as to what I want right now. There is an incredible sexy hispanic woman I have been chatting with but she is married, which I have NO problem with...I will not date a married man but if a married woman needs discretion from her husband, no problem. I know I want her...for hours... as often as possible. It's most definitely a lust driven desire.... yep, moooost definitely.
The male candidate(s) are diverse and in varying degrees of communication.
Number one is a man close to my age who has gotten into my head with his attentive ways. Morning texts, call during the day, steamy texts and some delicious pics that make parts of the anatomy...moist. He understands my health limitations and is willing to work around them.
Number two and I have been chatting for a longer period. At 12 years younger and someone who I describe as left brain, he remains a faceless stranger, content to chat with light flirts and banter. I enjoy his chats but his hesitation to even share a pic or meet for a quick drink has resulted in self-placement in the dreaded friend zone.
And still, buzzing in my daily existence, is the romance that wasn't. My tasty Asian fusion biker/cowboy. The man who I went against my instinct and let my guard down with... nothing to worry about here, he is just a friend... who I have fallen for in the classic stupid bad decision of wanting someone who isn't interested or attracted to me.
UGH.
Bad timing or indecision...I cannot tell. Tasty Morsel is friends with my nephew's business partner. I hired him to work on my house. Before coming to work for me his interactions with my nephew were not that frequent and usually only when his partner was there ,so when my tasty morsel wants to come over and just hang out or burn one with me, I get confused. I have never been shy about my attraction to him but I have also never acted on that attraction either. Twice I have embarrassed myself; once by telling him... straight up, I was meeting someone later that evening , a much younger man who was very interested in ending my 3 1/2 year "dry spell" but that he wasn't the one I was interested in....I wanted my Tasty morsel instead. I explained that I knew he had expressed interest in another person but if he was interested in me as well, I wouldn't go any further with my potential boy toy. I was answered with a guilty smirk and he began to say that he really liked this other person. I stopped him there, apologized and quickly left the premises. I blew off my date and went on a roll and burn to lick my wounded prides/self esteem.Flash forward to a few days later and I was able to spend time with him again. We were sitting outside, smoking a joint when I began to jokingly bust his chops for laughing during my moment of embarrasment. He asked if I had gone on my date and I told him no. It was then that he delivered the doozy of all mixed signal statements.
"I'm not saying no to the idea of you, I'm saying no to the idea of "that"". My only was response to laugh and tell him I wasn't offering "that" I was just trying to figure out if he was interested.
So I stopped talking to other men and started just spending time with him. We talked about past relationships, future goals, everything and nothing. Lunches, shopping expeditions for materials for the house and more conversations.He said he is old fashioned and likes to take things slow... I was surprised but actually okay with that.But then I felt myself catching the feels for a man... a man who hadn't held my hand or offered more than a kiss. I told him things I had not even shared with my husband of 10 years.
It was about about a month of this when I was invited to spend time with an old friend and his wife. Our evening included a reconnection with someone who I had known years before when we were both dating others. He was attentive and flirtatious and walked me to my car in an attempt to secure a kiss. I surprised myself when I rebuffed his kiss! A hot younger man offers me a kiss and I am not one who would usually decline.
The next afternoon I teasingly told Tasty Morsel that he owed me a kiss for the one I turned down the previous evening. His reaction surprised me to my core. It felt as if I had just told him that he was going to be forced to tongue fuck the snatch of a crack whore. He explained he NEVER kissed anyone until he "was in love" He acted offended that I had even joked about it. I joked it off by saying I didn't expect it immediately and once again...quickly vacated the premises. I texted him immediately after getting home apologizing for his obvious discomfort. It was a few hours later, after a nap, I came to the realization that I was to Tasty Morsel what aborted Boy Toy was to me. I want to say I took the realization well but nope... had to send him a text poring out my confession of desire,,,my longing to touch and kiss him and how I realized I was just making a fool of myself.He had often talked about the "spark" of attraction. In a moment of blog like communication I mentioned the spark and how even a flint and stone need contact to create a spark...spontaneous combustion is a myth blah blah blah. I then explained I need to not spend so much time with him.
And I did.
Which brings me back to number One. As I said he is most definitely someone who has me attracted... very attracted. He would be a wonderful play partner and excellent lover but is that enough?
And Tasty Morsel keeps buzzing around...just out of reach. Spending time with me whether anyone is here or not. A quick stop in on the way to the other job or after the day is done.
And I feel my heart breaking because I know...I know down deep...that if I move on to Candidate One the possibility of what could have been a real, true romance and relationship with Tasty Morsel will forever be gone.
1 comment
Really, it's almost over ?!?
Posted:May 13, 2018 11:21 pm
Last Updated:May 27, 2018 1:35 am
350 Views

Went for my latest oncologist appointment and received great news. I have one more round then a minor surgery and I will be cleared of cancer. About 3 months and this will be over.
I am sooooo ready to close this chapter and get to living again. It's been over a year since my diagnosis so trust when I say... next chapter!
Construction on the house has slowed.
I have decided to move on from my tasty asian fusion biker/cowboy. I still firmly believe he is a fucking idiot for not recognizing what was being offered but Mr Mixed Signals has no interest...shame. One mans loss is another mans gain.
Not much tonight, just happy and wanted to share.
6 Comments
What have I done?
Posted:Apr 24, 2018 1:08 am
Last Updated:Apr 29, 2018 9:09 pm
231 Views

I've tried a little "social experiment" with my profile lately. I have always just used the profile to meet women or couples. I might have met a single male once or twice but those two gentlemen were exceptions to the rule. A few days ago I turned my profile on to look at guys. I also turned on the IM and actually answered a few.
Oh my.
How interesting.
I have mixed feelings on the result.
As I say on my profile, I'm a different person. 5 years ago, when I was here before, I would have been like a kid in a candy store. I have had sooooo many responses I had to reboot my phone from the alerts.
Some very sexy younger men.... finely chiseled bodies with tattoos.
A few older men with well written profiles and equally intriguing messages.
An incredibly sexy chocolate couple.
I have exchanged numbers and texted with a few but...with the exception of a fellow Whovian...and a very distant gentleman ... I'm just not as interested as I want to be.
It's been three years and as much as I crave the touch of another... I have met two people in the real world that I am most interested in.
One male, one female, both distant in different ways.
The male, my gentleman cowboy/biker, send mixed signals to a blind signal reader.I treasure our conversational squirrel hunts fueled by 4:20 pipe hits and filled with laughter. I melt when he simply says "Yes Ma'am" in his sexy deep country voice. I want to kiss him so badly but...red haired waitress.
The female, a businesswoman/bar owner. I noticed her the first and only other time I went to her club.At the time I know she was in a relationship but that was 3ish years ago and I was dating someone at the time. I didn't actually meet her until a few weeks back when I joined old friends for dinner at her bar. They frequent the lesbian bar she owns and have known her for years. She and I spent half the evening just talking... a mini- conversational squirrel hunt. Her parting hug was...extended. I'll be making the drive again just to see if this might be a mutual interest thing.
Remember, I have NO GAME!!
So here is the thing, I have spent the last twelve years, since my divorce, avoiding emotional attachments. if I sensed a case of "The Feels" starting to catch...on either side...I ran.
I'm tired of running.
I am a strong independent woman who has carried a thick coat of armor around my heart/mind/soul.
Armor get's heavy.
Do I take a chance and see if anything develops with one of the wonderful people I've connected with during my experiment?
I hate being self aware.
0 Comments
I miss kissing
Posted:Apr 19, 2018 10:47 pm
Last Updated:May 13, 2018 11:26 pm
244 Views

You can tell what type of lover some is by their kiss. The first tentative moment when your eyes meet and lock. The slight lowering of the eyelids as you feel the rush... nipples stiffen and you involuntarily lightly lick your lips.
Mmmmm
The touch of a hand as you're pulled closer.
There is a moment, just before, when I realize a kiss is coming and I feel the need to suppress a light moan.
There is a moment when your lips touch... eyes still locked until the passion spills over and eyes close. ful and light... tentative tongues.. shared breath and the taste of wine or coffee or the hint of smoke... lingering.
I miss exploring hands and tongues...clothing shed in layers... passion interrupted with fits off laughter due to nervous fingers fumbling on buttons or stubborn zippers.
I miss pulling back...saving something for the next time, building the anticipation.
I miss a good old fashid make-out session.
1 comment
I hate my life.
Posted:Apr 19, 2018 2:10 am
Last Updated:Jul 20, 2018 5:44 am
243 Views

I only recently opened my profile search to include men. I did it because of a man I have met in real life. I am usually a 60/40 mix on dating, more women than men. I met a cowboy/biker/drool inducing tasty morsel of a man and he HAS NO IDEA I EXIST!!
It's frustrating as hell. I don't usually respond to men (especially cowboys) but this guy has gotten under my skin.
I know he is interested in someone else, he feels comfortable enough around me to ask dating advise like how to know when to ask someone out. It kills me.
So I have spent the last month building my "immunity" to him. When I feel myself about to slip I just repeat my immunity mantra " Red headed waitress, red headed waitress" and the urge subsides.
Then tonight it happened. I was scrolling down and saw an interesting guy. I was on my phone so the pic was small but I always read the profile before perusing the pics. One line in and I realized it was him.
I was mortified and like a dork I had to immediately back out and sign off.
Dumbass me forgot to read his profile.
I hate my life.
Before you start saying "Make a move, let him know"
He works for me. I have spent too many years in the corporate world and I just CAN'T.
I am a flirt and have embarrassed myself on more than one occasion but as I said, he is interested in someone else.
I have learned something about myself though. I need to know that I am found sexy/ attractive/ desirable or I lose interest. He is a true gentleman... too much of one.

Ugh, I hate my life...
0 Comments
Yes I said it, I have cancer.
Posted:Apr 19, 2018 12:37 am
Last Updated:May 19, 2018 11:34 pm
259 Views

I have had numerous emails and IM's asking me to meet. on my profile I said that health issues have changed my perspective on life. Let me explain.
I think it's time to introduce you to LJ, Chachi and Amber.
4/13 was the one year anniversary of my diagnosis of Kidney Cancer. On May30th I had surgery to remove my left kidney ( 6lb tumor named Chachi) and I am currently taking a targeted oral chemotherapy treatment. I mention this because the manner in which my cancer was detected is now a case study due to the unusual manner in which it presented. Kidney cancer is usually found quite late due to its tendency to spread to either the brain or the bones.
Mine was found because of a Vaginal Lesion...yep, my super vagina has the power to stop cancer in its tracks! That's some powerful P.
I have a recurring lesion just inside my vaginal opening. The lesion tends to develop a balloon like hematoma t(about the size of your thumb) that just sits there...in my vagina. I named him LJ, for Little Juicy.
LJ sits in a spot that bumps him up against my G Spot with each and every step. My Dr says as long as I refrain from penetration I am okay. I only have one more round (after my current one) and hopefully I will be through with treatment,
I currently cannot play "completely" but to be honest....I could use a hot make out session to burn off some steam.
Amber is the name I have given my asshole. Ill tell you more about her at a later date
I don't want to misrepresent.
1 comment
It's about time I wrote some thing here
Posted:Apr 16, 2018 9:15 pm
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2018 11:14 pm
331 Views

Hello all
I'm Denise and thanks for taking the time to actually check out my blog. As my profile says I have been here before and have been successful in meeting a few friends and lovers. I have always had profile handles that involved the "princess" or "Diva" descriptor in the name, not anymore. I'm different than before, more introspective and self aware.
I'm still a Phreak
I once described myself as a sexual cicada... destined to spend long periods in hibernation only to awaken and completely devour all in my path. I've been in hibernation for almost 3 years so look out... the beast is waking from her slumber
and I'm Famished.
4 Comments

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Most Recent Comments by Others

Post Poster Post Date
Catfish the catfisher (7)JoeJoe4096
Jul 4, 2018 12:07 pm
Really, it's almost over ?!? (8)fivestar562
May 14, 2018 7:17 am
Yes I said it, I have cancer. (3)C00kieDuster
Apr 22, 2018 11:54 am
I miss kissing (1)BigDaddyRick62
Apr 20, 2018 9:18 am
It's about time I wrote some thing here (4)pocogato12
Apr 17, 2018 7:35 am